Entry #16

While looking for the dream character/element and dream meanings in general I forgot to mention something for those who were maybe wondering. The next night after the first sleep paralysis and now these few latest nights I haven't lucid or even dreamed, at all. Or at least I don't remember seeing any dreams.

So far the dream meaning research to explain the weird happenings and especially the meaning of the bearcentaur character has not done any progress to explain anything. All the dream guides etc. have told that repeating happenings and characters could be things our minds create to tell us something we're not thinking about when awake. Most likely this would be sensible explanation for the bearcentaur as well. Heck, even the things I wrote down on the previous post (did she cause sleep paralysis etc.) sounds now completely stubid. My dreams happen in my mind, of course the character can't be some overpowered being that does things on its own. It is my brain's and imagination's creation!

But still, I haven't found possible explaining meaning for her, even most likely character with this kind of behavior, would be part of my brain trying to tell me to stop doing something. But the problem is when I connected all the dream meanings within my own personal feelings and such, I can't make the connection. What wrong am I doing exactly? I don't even drink too much alcohol or use any other kind of drugs, so it can't be anything like that either. What does she then want me to stop doing?

Although, she said on both dreams something like "you should not be here".
What does that mean? Be where? ...In the dream?

I really don't know anymore. More and more I look into it, it makes less sense.
I try to lucid dream tonight to see what happens. Wish me luck, I guess.